I'm gonna start this story off with a little background. I.HATE.PUBLIC.SPEAKING. I've got a lot of flaws no doubt but this one is the biggest. It goes back to when I was in Kindergarten and wanted to be in the beauty pageant. My always-smarter-than- me Momma tried her best to talk me out of it, but I would not hear it. I've been head strong since the womb. That situation ended badly. I did something funny on stage and everyone laughed at me and I have had terrible stage fright since then. When I was like 8, my GA teacher at church tried to make me be in some play, and ignored my pleas of terror, and I quit GA's and honestly never liked her again.
So I have spent the better part of my life avoiding any situation that would require me to speak in a crowd or be on stage. Even walking across the stage to accept my diploma at high school graduation was a nightmare. I skipped that ceremony in college since it was actually an option. Notice that we ran away to get married, which did not require being in front of a crowd or making out in public !
Fast forward to this fall, when I was peer pressured by my friends to go to exercise classes. I never do those for all the previously mentioned reasons! Well Zumba, I will admit was fun... but I did look like Big bird out there on the dance floor, and conisdered running out of there after 5 minutes. Dancing, I can totally do. I thank Keisha for that. But in public, following an instructor... I was a disaster. The difference is, I had friends there, and Cory is like a personal cheerleader. She is always patting you on the back or whispering some sort of inspiration so during the class she was being fun and also giving me pep talks left and right. Wooty was also there, and she goes frequently and has a really tight booty so i just stared at that for inspiration to continue. I made it through the class and may actually go to another one.
Tonight however, was quite a different experience. Ya'll know my love and passion for all that is Apple. I have been trying so hard to figure out a job that I can get that is suited to my skills as well as something that I would enjoy and Apple seems like a perfect fit. I applied weeks ago but they always hire in swoops so last weekend when I got an email to a hiring event I was super stoked. It was for tonight, Sunday from 7-9pm. So many people showed up! Like 35 i think. Right when we walked in all the employees made a tunnel for us to walk through while they clapped and cheered... and that was the beginning of my profuse sweating and red face. The rapid heartbeat however, started when I had to stand up introduce myself, and talk about why I wanted to work there, and what my favorite Halloween costume is. I cant remember any of my Halloween costumes, although I am sure I had some? When it was my turn to talk, I almost fainted , was definitely sweating and I am not sure if all my sentences went together b.c I think I was stuttering? I told them my fav costume was when I was "the joker" from the Batman movie. My mom told me afterward that I was never "The Joker" so I guess I am even crazier than I thought. I just totally, in that moment of *complete freakout* let my imagination run wild and produce fake memories. ha
Things really escalated when we had to do a SKIT. Right when the guy said "skit" I thought.... "How quickly can I get out of here, and assuming that i bolt, How will I get out of the mall since all the doors are locked?" I could not figure out the answer to that in the 3 minutes we were limited to for this skit so I was part of a skit before I knew it. The challenge was to present something to the room, like a sales pitch, but it could not be about anything apple! Thankfully a lady in my group took charge, told us we were speaking about Orbitz gum and gave us all some parts.
The whole process threw me for a loop! It would be like applying for a job at McDonalds and them asking you to roll sushi during your interview. I was totally expecting to get in there, meet some people and talk about electronics, technology, computers and gadgets. I was prepared and excited to do that, but I did NONE of that! I was awkward, uncool, and a disaster. To make matters worse, everyone else who was there was totally cool, stylish, and witty. It was like the room was a rainbow and I was the color white. I don't know the last time I have been in a room with so many stylish dudes! Don't know if ya'll know this about Nashville, but people here have some serious style. Especially dudes! It is one of my favorite things about Nashville! So tonight, I basically took my self esteem, wadded it up like a paper towel and lit it on fire .......... and then stomped on it! I felt like a complete idiot walking out of there!
I'm a little sad that I was unable to convey my passion, knowledge or friendliness! I am very sad that I may never get one of those cool apple shirts! UGHHHH, but I will keep you all posted!