Sunday, October 18, 2009

So I had a Job Interview Tonight....


I'm gonna start this story off with a little background. I.HATE.PUBLIC.SPEAKING. I've got a lot of flaws no doubt but this one is the biggest. It goes back to when I was in Kindergarten and wanted to be in the beauty pageant. My always-smarter-than- me Momma tried her best to talk me out of it, but I would not hear it. I've been head strong since the womb. That situation ended badly. I did something funny on stage and everyone laughed at me and I have had terrible stage fright since then. When I was like 8, my GA teacher at church tried to make me be in some play, and ignored my pleas of terror, and I quit GA's and honestly never liked her again.
So I have spent the better part of my life avoiding any situation that would require me to speak in a crowd or be on stage. Even walking across the stage to accept my diploma at high school graduation was a nightmare. I skipped that ceremony in college since it was actually an option. Notice that we ran away to get married, which did not require being in front of a crowd or making out in public !
Fast forward to this fall, when I was peer pressured by my friends to go to exercise classes. I never do those for all the previously mentioned reasons! Well Zumba, I will admit was fun... but I did look like Big bird out there on the dance floor, and conisdered running out of there after 5 minutes. Dancing, I can totally do. I thank Keisha for that. But in public, following an instructor... I was a disaster. The difference is, I had friends there, and Cory is like a personal cheerleader. She is always patting you on the back or whispering some sort of inspiration so during the class she was being fun and also giving me pep talks left and right. Wooty was also there, and she goes frequently and has a really tight booty so i just stared at that for inspiration to continue. I made it through the class and may actually go to another one.
Tonight however, was quite a different experience. Ya'll know my love and passion for all that is Apple. I have been trying so hard to figure out a job that I can get that is suited to my skills as well as something that I would enjoy and Apple seems like a perfect fit. I applied weeks ago but they always hire in swoops so last weekend when I got an email to a hiring event I was super stoked. It was for tonight, Sunday from 7-9pm. So many people showed up! Like 35 i think. Right when we walked in all the employees made a tunnel for us to walk through while they clapped and cheered... and that was the beginning of my profuse sweating and red face. The rapid heartbeat however, started when I had to stand up introduce myself, and talk about why I wanted to work there, and what my favorite Halloween costume is. I cant remember any of my Halloween costumes, although I am sure I had some? When it was my turn to talk, I almost fainted , was definitely sweating and I am not sure if all my sentences went together b.c I think I was stuttering? I told them my fav costume was when I was "the joker" from the Batman movie. My mom told me afterward that I was never "The Joker" so I guess I am even crazier than I thought. I just totally, in that moment of *complete freakout* let my imagination run wild and produce fake memories. ha
Things really escalated when we had to do a SKIT. Right when the guy said "skit" I thought.... "How quickly can I get out of here, and assuming that i bolt, How will I get out of the mall since all the doors are locked?" I could not figure out the answer to that in the 3 minutes we were limited to for this skit so I was part of a skit before I knew it. The challenge was to present something to the room, like a sales pitch, but it could not be about anything apple! Thankfully a lady in my group took charge, told us we were speaking about Orbitz gum and gave us all some parts.
The whole process threw me for a loop! It would be like applying for a job at McDonalds and them asking you to roll sushi during your interview. I was totally expecting to get in there, meet some people and talk about electronics, technology, computers and gadgets. I was prepared and excited to do that, but I did NONE of that! I was awkward, uncool, and a disaster. To make matters worse, everyone else who was there was totally cool, stylish, and witty. It was like the room was a rainbow and I was the color white. I don't know the last time I have been in a room with so many stylish dudes! Don't know if ya'll know this about Nashville, but people here have some serious style. Especially dudes! It is one of my favorite things about Nashville! So tonight, I basically took my self esteem, wadded it up like a paper towel and lit it on fire .......... and then stomped on it! I felt like a complete idiot walking out of there!
I'm a little sad that I was unable to convey my passion, knowledge or friendliness! I am very sad that I may never get one of those cool apple shirts! UGHHHH, but I will keep you all posted!

8 comments:

Caro said...

I feel your pain. However, you are one of the most stylish people I know. You probably fit in like a glove. Even though you don't feel like it everyone else was probably just as nervous as you and performed the same as you (a good performance). I would be proud of myself for not fleeing the scene. Good job I say.

Red Lipstick Style said...

GREAT job for just doing it! I'm with you, I'm not a public speaking fan, never have been!

Courtney said...

Aw LG I'm sure you did much better than you thought. Everyone gets nervous speaking in front of others. And a skit? I would have had a full on panic attack in front of everyone so the sheer fact you held it together is awesome. So good job, and at least that part is over!

scottw512 said...

You're always so self confident and outgoing. I never would have guessed.

grizaham said...

Woah.
That closely resembles times of my pledgeship during college.. And most of that was ILLEGAL! That sounds like the worst possible situation ever!
I am pretty sure i don't like apple as much after seeing how upset you were last night..

Julie Bray said...

Totally agree with the previous comments! You are extremely stylist & I bet people were looking @ you getting nervous, wishing they were as stylist and cool as you!
I do lots of public speaking for work, but would have completely freaked out for a skit and that type of speaking. That sucks! What a weird interview.
My new mission is to find a way to get you one of those shirts! Surviving that interview, you deserve it!

Amy said...

LG-I love you and your style, and let's be honest, not one person on the planet can sell apple products like you...so what if you aren't the crazy person in a crowd waving your arms like crazy. Who needs that? We will make you an apple shirt, you don't need to work there. Besides if the interview was like that, just think how horrific any internal training would be!!!!!

Zumba in East Nash is always forgiving, fun songs, and making fools of ourselves, join me anytime!

Kyle said...

LCG, I am sure that you did a great job! Companies like Apple are run by awkward folks that are on a different wavelength than anyone else, so it is no surprise to me that they would have an ordeal like that for interested interviewees. Maybe they just thought that would be a fun way to break the ice. Who knows....

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